Cat nap’s horror defies science
The world’s leading feline biologists are baffled by the discovery of a new Japanese breed of cat who, while registering as high as ‘OMG!!!1’ on the official cuteness scale during waking hours, transforms into something far more disturbing when it sleeps.
This is Setsu-chan, owned by Japanese illustrator Mino. He was recently brought to the attention of the scientific community via Twitter, where a series of photographs demonstrated how Setsu-chan deceptively mimics a normal cat while awake: fluffy, playful, a blue-eyed dreamer who doesn’t play by the rules.
But when Setsu-chan falls asleep the drapery tumbles, and it becomes all too apparent that he is not a loveable family pet, but a breed of despicable nightmare fodder previously unknown to science.
WARNING: Some readers may find the following images disturbing.
“It isn’t a breed of cat we recognise,” said Prof. Kit E. Litter, a prominent veterinary biologist who we totally didn’t just make up. “We have requested that Setsu-chan be turned over to us for a series of rigorous examinations. A veteran zoological exorcist has been drafted in from Peru, as we have not yet been able to rule out demonic possession.” The request has so far been ignored.
Prof Kit E. Litter, pictured in his lab.
Mino has instead won a publishing deal to release a photobook case study of this mysterious new breed. The book, titled The Most Awful Sleeping Face in Japan: The Unparalleled Beautiful Cat Setsu-chan, is released today in Japan, and is expected to become a set text in veterinary study all over the world.
The emergence of Setsu-chan comes mere weeks after the news that internet sensation Grumpy Cat has earned her owners over $100million to date. Reports of a special pay-per-view boxing match between the two remain unconfirmed.