But only #LadsLadsLads can apply

The London property market has reached the point where even renting a single room in Penge is prohibitively expensive. So just imagine what it would cost to rent a room in an £8million penthouse flat in Paddington.

As it turns out, it’ll cost you nothing. That’s if you’re chosen by a pair of ‘lads’ who are offering just such a room for free.

An advert on SpareRoom reads: “We’re two lads living in a large 4000 sq ft Penthouse in Paddington. We’ve successfully built and sold two well known technology companies and are now working on the third.”

So far, so almost-normal.

Live in this room for free

It continues: “We’d like to find an interesting flatmate to hang out with – we don’t need the money (hence the room is FREE!) but we want some good company – someone to hang out with, party with, bounce ideas around with and generally enjoy all that London has to offer.”

Even this sounds fairly normal, until you remember that these are self-proclaimed ‘lads.’ Hanging out and partying for them probably means slurping Jagerbombs from each other’s belly buttons at a high end strip club before grabbing an Uber home for a quick game of soggy biscuit.

“We are open minded about the sort of person we’d like,” the advert continues. “You might already be successful and wealthy and want to live with like minded people or at the very least you’ll be ambitious.”

To live for free in the nice flat you need to be wealthy enough to afford it if you had to. Makes sense.

“Enjoying getting drunk quite often is essential!”

Top bantz.

The successful applicant won’t just benefit from the swanky apartment and the no doubt delightful company. There is also “a team of household staff to look after you,” including cleaners, a chef, and a driver.

Don’t worry, it’s not all excess and existential agony. Smokers are not welcome, and you can’t bring any pets with you; the flat already has two Chihuahuas in residence, “and we don’t want any more pets.”